Heroine Boy
by Marlin Lette
Summary: Axel/Riku. Axel and Riku have been together for 3 years. Axel is a heroine addict. life's not easy for either of them. will Axel try to get help? will Riku leave his lover? very everclear song influenced. Warnings- Drug use,Yaoi
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer-I own nothing. The song is Heroin Girl by Everclear.**

**Author's Note- let me know what you think.**

**Warnings- Yaoi, DRUGS, language, kind of dark.**

Riku strolled into Axel's apartment shutting the door softly behind him. The redhead was passed out on the bed face down. Riku walked over and looked at his sleeping form, he was still dressed in his clothes from last night, even his shoes were still on. Riku reached down and shook his thin shoulder softly.

"Wake up!"

Axel jumped slightly and opened his green eyes, grimacing. "Hey Riku."

The silver haired teen frowned, "You were out last night again weren't you."

Axel nodded slightly and turned over onto his back. He looked up at Riku, "You know I love you right?"

Riku sighed, "Yeah, I know. I love you too...I just wish that you wouldn't do that so much."

"Yeah..." Axel looked ashamed for a moment but it didn't last.

"You know its almost 4pm right? I'm already done with kickboxing practice and I picked up some shit for dinner if you want anything," Riku ran his hand through his long silver hair.

"Yeah...that'd be awesome..." Axel said as he pulled out a cigarette and lit it.

"...Can you be sober for part of the night tonight?" Riku was hesitant.

"Yeah of course...why do you even have to ask?" Axel said around his cigarette.

"Well...every time I see you at night...your either so high you can barley make any sense or in the process of getting there," Riku looked down at the ground.

"Uh...yeah... I know it bothers you babe...but I can't stop..." Axel sat up.

"Yeah well...it's okay. I got you enough to get you through the week..." Riku sat down on the bed next to his boyfriend.

"Thanks babe...you know you didn't have to..." Axel said it, but Riku knew he did. Last time Axel ran out...he went and got himself fucked up, not in the way he planned.

"It's okay...you know I'd do anything to make you happy," Riku smiled, it was a tragic sight.

"I know," Axel shuffled over to Riku and wrapped his thin arms around him. Riku leaned against him for a moment before he got up.

"I'm gonna go grab the Mexican food I ordered...it's at the place still," he kissed Axel lightly on the lips and walked out the door.

_Esther used to be_

_the kind of girl you would _

_never leave_

_She'd do anything_

_to give me what I need for my disease_

_She'd do anything_

_I can hear them talking in_

_the real world_

_But they don't understand that_

_I'm happy in Hell_

_with my Heroin Girl._

Riku came back to the apartment to see Axel sitting on the edge of the bed, showered and in less scummy looking clothes, they probably still weren't clean but they were better. Riku carried the food into the small kitchen and set it on the counter.

He turned around and looked at his lover. Three years they'd been together...things were different then. Axel was happy, carefree and not an addict. He used to have muscles and there were no marks on his arms, less lines on his face. Two years ago he got involved with the wrong people, they got him into it. At first he thought he could handle it, Riku knew better, he knew the path he was going down but just couldn't leave him. Axel never once asked him to join him with it, he knew better.

About a year ago Axel started having problems getting what he needed. Once Riku seen him start to freak out he helped him get it. He worked at a club and went to college. After a while he dropped out of college and took up a second job at a crappy little diner. He made enough to pay for his and Axel's rent, they moved in together when Axel got evicted. Axel would shoot up while Riku was at work at his second job. Riku would come home and wrap himself in Axel's warm embrace, whether the redhead was high or not. Axel would try to see through the haze to talk seriously to him but it didn't always work. Neither did the sex. Riku remembered the night when he came home and Axel had the twin teardrop tatoos on his face. Then it shocked him, now they just seemed to suit him.

Currently the sober Axel walked over to him and the food. Riku looked up and smiled, he loved it when Axel was sober. Axel wrapped his arms lovingly around him. He kissed his forehead, both of his cheeks then both of his lips. Riku smiled as he returned the kiss. His stomach interupted whatever might have happened by grumbling, both of them felt it, Riku laughed. A rare thing these days.

"When's the last time you've eaten?" Typical of Axel to ask that.

"I don't know, yesterday morning maybe?" Riku said as he leaned against Axel's chest, he was so damn thin now.

"Okay so let's eat," Axel kissed him again before he let go to get food. They sat down on the ratty couch in front of the tv and ate their food. Once they finished Riku threw away the empty box and curled up to Axel, who held him. Axel looked down at him, a soft smile on his face.

"What love?" Riku asked.

"Nothing...just thinking how beautiful you are," Axel's speech was clear, that more than what he said made Riku happy.

"I love you," Riku said as he kissed a spot on Axel's neck. Axel smiled and kissed him, gently pushing him back on the couch. Riku kissed him as he pulled him closer to his body. Tonight sex wouldn't just be attempt to feel something, it would be sweet and gentle. Not rough and hard like it usually was.

Afterward Riku caught his breath as he lay against Axel's chest. He sighed contentedly, completely set on sleeping like this in Axel's arms, with him being sober until he felt the man stir.

"Riku...I need it..." Riku's smile fell.

"Alright, I'm going to shower then..." Riku sat up.

"Riku...I'm sorry," Axel knew he wasn't happy.

"I know...I love you Axel," Riku kissed him before he walked over to the bathroom.

"Love you too..." Axel said softly before he pulled out his drug. He tied off his arm before he tested the needle.

Riku turned on the hot water and stepped into the spray. He hated it when Axel did this. Riku punched the wall hard, most likely breaking a knuckle, wouldn't be the first time. He always said he was sorry...then why didn't he ever try to quit. But then again Riku didn't help...he just helped him get it. He was always so afraid that one day he'd come home and Axel would be lying there dead, overdosed.

Riku walked into the bedroom and put on clothes. He walked out into other room, Axel was still lying on the couch but Riku knew, he was high. Axel lost the initial rush and was just feeling the rest of it. Riku walked over to him and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek.

Axel looked up at him, "Hey..."

"Come on babe, let's go to bed. You got work tomorrow," Riku pulled him up and into his arms. He ignored what he said and laid down next to him. Riku sighed and set the alarm clock, 7 am would come quickly.


	2. Strawberry

**Disclaimer-I own nothing. The songs...the first one is Strawberry by Everclear while the second is Unemployed Boyfriend by Everclear. **

**Sorry about the lack of updates but it took me a while to come up with this chapter. Chapter three won't take me this long to get up.**

Axel awoke to an annoying beeping sound. Cracking open his poison green eyes he shut off the alarm. He looked over at the still sleeping form next to him. Riku. Why he put up with him, Axel decided he'd never know. He knew he worked two jobs and did everything possible to make their lives easier. He must be exhausted. Slowly the thin redhead got out of bed trying not to wake his lover.

Tiredly he walked to the bathroom and turned on the shower. At least they got the bill paid this month. Once the water heated up, he stepped under the warm spray. For a few moments he just let the warmth consume his thoughts, clearing his mind for the day. Shaking his head the redhead cleaned himself off before he turned off the water. Stepping out of the shower he wrapped a beat-up, old towel around his waist, at least it was clean.

Axel padded softly into the bedroom. He glanced over at Riku, he was still asleep. Good thing he didn't have work for another two hours. Axel let his towel fall to the ground as he pulled a pair of jeans on over his thin hips. Axel dug a white beater out of the drawers and pulled it on before he rummaged around for his work shirt. Axel stopped in his search when he felt a pair of warm arms encircle his waist.

"Morning babe," Axel said softly as he felt Riku lean his head against his back.

"Mornin', whatcha lookin' for?" Riku said, his speech slightly slurred from sleep.

"My work shirt. Sorry if I woke you," Axel said as he turned around to face his lover.

"Oh... it's okay I need to get up soon anyway," Riku said as Axel leaned down to embrace him. Riku smiled lightly when Axel pressed a gentle kiss to his lips and released him back in search of his shirt. Letting out a small 'Aha' when he found the ugly thing he threw it on.

"I gotta get goin' I'll see yah later. I love you," Axel said before he walked out the front door.

Slowly the redhead made his way down the street to his work. Which was a Starbucks. The pay wasn't great but at least it was something.

A crappy black car pulled to the side of the road beside Axel, the window rolled down. It was Xigbar.

"What're you doing?" Xigbar asked.

"Going to work, what do you want?" Xigbar was the one that got him into it. He used to be his dealer then he got too greedy, for money and the drugs.

"Want to get high... I know you're itching for it," Axel looked at him hating himself. The other man was right... he wanted it... he always wanted it. Silently Axel got into the car.

_I ask you for a slow ride_

_Going nowhere_

_You look like Satan_

_You ask me if I want to get high_

_Couple of bags down in old town_

_You tie your arm and_

_Ask me if I wanted to drive_

Xigbar smiled and drove away. Axel didn't have a clue where they were going, but he didn't care. Finally after what seemed like forever the car stopped, they were out in back of an old building. Axel glanced up at it momentarily, it looked like it used to be a factory.

When he looked back his old dealer already had his arm tied and had shot up. Axel's mind wandered to Riku briefly, how how he feel about this? Probably not very happy. Xigbar coughed and Axel snapped back to reality. He tied his arm and pulled out a sterile needle, he was a junkie yes, but not stupid.

All time was lost for Axel. He didn't know where he was anymore, he remembered getting out of the car and walking down the road. After that he didn't have a clue. It was dark outside and Axel had just finished coming down. It was rough, even more so now that he was along and outside.

Axel sighed and held his head as he picked himself up off the ground. Riku was going to be pissed it had to be late.

_Last thing I recall_

_I was in the air_

_I woke up on the street_

_Crawling with my strawberry burns_

_Ten long years in a straight line_

_They fall like water_

_Yes, I guess I fucked up again_

Slowly he walked in some direction he really didn't know which, but he'd grown up in this city so he knew it well. Finally he came to a main road, Axel pulled out his cell phone...who would give him a ride at 11 at night. Riku would but he didn't want to make him drive out here it was a long drive. Larxene was either working, too high to move asleep or having sex. He didn't want to interrupt any of those things. That left him with Demnyx. He was a good kid, same age as Riku, who was a few years younger than Axel.

The redhead dialed the blonde's number and sat down on the side of the road.

"Hey Dem...sorry to bother you...it's Axel..."

"I know it's late but I need a ride...I'm at the corner of Route 31 South...by the big gas station...yeah..." Axel hung up the phone, Dem was on his way. He sat there for a while smoking a cigarette and playing with the fringes on the bottom of his pants. After what seemed like forever a car pulled up and Axel got inside.

"Thanks," Axel said.

"You're lucky I care about you man..."

"Yeah I know..."

"Did you even go to work today?" Demnyx asked as he found a radio station.

"...No, Xigbar showed up... and... I just went with him," Axel felt like an idiot.

"Riku called me earlier...he asked if I knew where you were," Axel looked over at him, "He really loves you, ya know. You're damn lucky to have him."

"...Yeah... I know..." The song on the radio had caught his attention. He quoted it to Riku the day they met.

_This is gonna sound a little obsessive_

_This is gonna sound a little bit strange_

_I have one thing to say_

_Before I turn and I walk away_

_This is gonna sound a little impulsive_

_This is gonna sound a little insane_

_I know you don't know me yet_

_But you and I, we will be together someday_

_Someday_

_I know, I know, I sound like I'm on drugs_

_Listen to me when I say_

_That ever since when I first saw you_

_Sittin' on your car outside_

_You asked for a cigarette_

_I couldn't stop starin' at your eyes_

_Ever since when I first saw you_

_Looking bored in that plastic chair_

_With the lights of the office around you_

_Those blond streaks, they look so pretty in your black hair_

_You look cool and alternative with that disaffected stare_

_Yeah you want people to think that you just don't care_

_Hey you can be with me_

_Yeah 'cause I just might be the one_

_Who will treat you like you're perfect_

_Who will always make you come_

_Hey you can be with me_

_Yes I will always let you win_

_I will never be like those other guys_

_I will never be your unemployed boyfriend_

Axel looked at his hands, he could barely remember those days, when he'd bust into song the the younger male. Just to make him smile, not because he felt bad, but because he liked his smile. Those first few lines were almost too much for him to bear, those were the exact words he'd used on Riku. Quoting this song to pick him up. Who knew it would work?

Demnyx looked over at him and seen the older male break down in tears.

"Axel..." Demnyx said softly.

"I've really fucked up... everything..."

"Yeah you have. You can change... it's never too late you know," Demnyx wasn't going to pity him, it was his own fault.

"But I don't know how to...it's too difficult, I've tried before..." Axel sniffed a bit and composed himself. They pulled up outside of his apartment building. All the lights were off.

"I'll wait here until you get inside..."

Axel nodded and got out of the car. After trying the front door and finding it locked he got back into Demnyx's car.

"Okay you're sleeping at my place..." They pulled into Demnyx's driveway and got out. The blonde lived in a small one bedroom house, most of the time his lover would be there with him. Axel followed him inside and sat down on the couch. The blonde walked into the bedroom and came back out a few moments later in a pair of pajama bottoms with a blanket and a pillow in his hands. He threw them to Axel before he spoke.

"You need to do something with yourself or you're gonna loose Riku. He's talented, strong, sexy, go get help," Demnyx gave him a look before he walked into his bedroom and shut the door. Axel sighed as he laid down...Dem was right.


	3. Another Ovedose

**Disclaimer-I own nothing don't sue me. The song is again... Heroin Girl by Everclear.**

**Warnings- darkness, DRUGS, language, sad...**

**Author's Note-Sorry for the lack of updates. This was actually supposed to be chapter 2 but I liked it better as 3.**

The next day after Axel walked home he got a phone call. It was Demyx again Axel was surprised he was calling so soon after he had left.. He sounded upset. Very upset.

"Dem, what is it?"

"I-It's Larxene...she overdosed last night...they couldn't save her..." Demyx was practically crying by this point.

"Holy shit..." Axel sat down on the steps outside of the apartment complex.

"All they said was it's just another overdose...fuck... I gotta go...Axel?" Demyx sniffled a bit.

"Yeah,"

"Don't let yourself end up like her...please..."

"Yeah Dem," Axel closed his phone and got up. He made his way back inside and sat down on the couch, letting it hit him. She was dead, really dead and gone. She was one of their close friends. She had always been around, when she wasn't busy doing something else. But when push came to shove Larxene was there.

_They found her out in the fields_

_about a mile from home_

_her face was warmed by the sun _

_but her body was cold_

_I heard the policeman say_

_just another overdose..._

_just another overdose!_

Axel held his head in his hands as the door opened and Riku walked in.

"Hey...Axel? Where we-" He wanted to know where he was last night, but the words died on his tongue when he seen his lover's state.

What is it?" Riku walked over to him and slung his arm around his shoulders.

"Larxene...overdosed..." Axel choked back tears.

"Oh God..." Riku pulled Axel closer to him. In turn Axel curled up, his head buried in Riku's chest.

"They couldn't save her...babe...fuck...I-you know I love you right?" Axel was crying by this point.

"I know Ax. I love you too..." This got Riku thinking more and more, what if that was Axel, what if he was the one who OD'd. And Riku would never be able to forgive himself. "Axel can I ask you a favor?"

The redhead nodded as he composed himself. "Yeah Ri."

"Can you...try to stop...doing heroin?" Riku bit his lower lip nervously.

"I-I don't know..."

"I don't want you to end up like her. Please babe, try. I can-I can take you somewhere to get help. Please Axel, for me?" Riku was looking him in the eyes now.

"Riku...I don't...I can try," Axel didn't look happy about it, but upon seeing the look in his boyfriend's tried eyes he knew he should. Demyx was right, he'd lose him.

"Thank you, I'll be with you all through this. But I want you to go to a clinic, I'll stay with you there if you want...if they let me," Riku kissed the top of his head.

"How do you plan on affording this?"

"I have some money saved up and I can sell the heroin you already have, it doesn't matter, I'll do anything," Riku laid his head on top of Axel's, deciding the skip over that Riku's only living family member was quite wealthy and would loan him enough.

"Are you sure?" Axel wrapped one arm around his waist, finally noticing that Riku was a lot thinner.

"Yeah babe, I'm sure," Riku smiled reassuringly at him.

"Alright, I guess. When do you wanna lock me up?" Axel asked.

"Your not gonna be locked up. I just don't want you to deal with it here, not to mention that they have shit to make it easier. But I was thinking tonight or tomorrow morning?" Riku said nervously.

"Alright...well...it's almost 7 now... so... I don't know..."

"Well if you think you can deal until tomorrow morning then we'll go then," Riku still held him.

"I think so..." Axel sighed as he sat up only to lay back on the couch and pull Riku down with him.

"Babe... I miss the old you. Before the drugs...this could really be a good thing you know?" Riku laid his head on the redhead's chest and curled up to him with his arm around Axel's thin waist.

"I know. I couldn't and wouldn't do this without you. I'll just deal with it I guess, as long as you don't leave me," Axel let his eyes close.

"You know I won't," Riku kissed his jawline softly.

"Mm...Riku...this isn't going to be easy..." Axel said quietly, then added, "I think I should be checked in tonight...I can't do this being here..."

Riku looked up at him, "Oh okay...I'll get some shit together and take you there..." Riku kissed him.

Axel scratched at his arm a bit as Riku got up to pack. After finding out one of his friends was dead it made him want to do it more, to cope. _Stupid._ Riku put Axel's clothes in a bag leaving out his hooded sweatshirt, which he put on. He walked back into the living room, where Axel was lighting up a cigarette. Riku walked over and stood in front of him.

"C'mon babe," he didn't look very happy.

Axel stood up, wordlessly and followed his lover out the door. They got into Riku's small car and pulled out of the driveway.

As Riku drove Axel stared blankly out the window for a while, "So how far away is this place...and how do you know where it is?"

"About an hour away...my Uncle Seph told me about it... he said it's the best this place has to offer..." Riku kept his eyes on the road.

"Oh... he knows? About me doing drugs?" Axel suddenly felt ashamed, Sephiroth was a well respected man. As cold as he came off, he truly cared for the wellbeing of his only nephew.

"Yeah... I talked to him. He uh..he's helping me pay for this... well he said that if we ever needed help with something...he could pay so..." Riku glanced over at Axel quickly.

"Oh...okay."

Riku sighed softly and turned on the radio, more to keep himself awake than to drown out the silence. He'd had a tiring day.

"Riku, are you okay?" Axel asked noticing the exhaustion on his lover's face.

"Yeah, I'm just a lil tired is all...work was rough," Riku yawned.

"Oh..." Axel laced his shaking fingers through Riku's.

They spent the rest of the ride in silence. Neither knowing the right words to express what they felt.

After a while Riku slowed down in front of a iron barred gate. The letters on the sign beside it read, "Welcome to The Johnson Memorial Institute."

"Well...here we are."


End file.
